Navigating Change in Relationships

Taking the next step in a romantic relationship can be a big deal. Whether it’s moving in together, getting married, adopting a pet, or saying yes to kids, the routine and normalcy you know will inevitably change. With these life changes, there is a need to discuss and plan together. Oftentimes it’s talking about really hard things, like money, intimacy, and setting boundaries. These are just a few topics that come up often with my clients. It can be challenging to get on the same page as your partner. You may have wildly different lived experiences and relationships with family/friends, so it can be difficult to find the middle ground.  

When folks experience change, there is a tendency to feel irritable, anxious, and exhausted. This lovely combination can wreak havoc on relationships. Speaking as not just a therapist, but also as a regular human being, I know I am not the most patient and understanding partner when change is thrust upon me. I mean really, who is?! However, an important piece in navigating change and transitions is nurturing the emotional bond within the relationship. Amidst the stress and uncertainty of change, emotional trust serves as a pillar of resilience. This creates a sense of security, therefore allowing partners to weather challenges with compassion and understanding, fostering a stronger bond. Ultimately, it’s knowing your partner has your back. It’s knowing you can show up with messy hair and morning breath, and they still accept you. This makes all the difference in feeling like your partner is your partner, and not your enemy. Now not every moment is going to be rainbows, but if you give yourself and your partner grace, and the benefit of the doubt, you can make it through these challenging moments.

For those seeking guidance during transition and life changes, my workshop Make Your Relationship Kick-Ass: Navigating Next Steps offers structured support. We will discuss essential aspects of relationships, such as common communication patterns, healthy ways to resolve conflict, ways to start talking about money, sex, and boundary setting. These topics tend to be emotionally charged, particularly as couples embark on new challenges. By laying a solid foundation or revisiting the existing foundation, couples can navigate change with greater confidence and unity, enriching their journey together. 

The workshop is open to all couples, and will run on Thursdays from 5pm-6pm, starting on June 6th and ending on June 27th. The workshop is $200 per couple for the 4 weeks. Both partners are expected to attend each week.  

Please reach out to me, Katie Tesensky Conn, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, if you would like to sign up or have questions about the workshop at Katie@RoomToBreatheChicago.Com.

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The Ebb and Flow of Grief

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The Relationship Between Rest, Liberation, and Communal Healing